God is good. He always gives me funny moments in the midst of the stress. I was doing a bit of cleaning last night, and decided to burn my garbage. Not sure if most of you know this, but here in Bolivia the sewage system isn’t designed for paper, so you have to dispose of your toilet paper in a garbage can and then get rid of it later. Anyhow, I dumped the garbage from the kitchen and the can from the bathroom into my burning barrel…along with a little gasoline to make sure it all burns well (yes…I am a guy. I think we’ve covered that. If you’re going to burn something…do it right!). Now keep in mind it was 11 o’clock at night and I was tired. There is possibly an outside chance that perhaps I used a little too much gasoline. I tossed the match and all I really remember was this fireball and then little pieces of burning toilet paper floating all over my yard. It was kind of pretty really….until my lawn caught on fire.

So now I have little burn marks all over my yard. Fortunately my yard is still pretty much a dump, so it doesn’t matter much. You might ask why I was so tired since 11 PM isn’t normally that late for me. Well, I experienced my first Bolivian wedding the night before. Wow…not sure what to say. The invitations all said the ceremony would start at 7 PM. I was driving the bride to the wedding (she’s a volunteer at the home) and was told not to bother picking her up until 7:30 or 8:00. Edly and I were actually delivering the flowers for decorating the church at 6:20. The bride and I arrived at the church promptly at 8:30 and…the groom wasn’t there yet. He didn’t show up until 9:00. So we got started at 9:30. The meal didn’t get started until after 10:00. I didn’t end up getting home until nearly 2 AM. Then to finish off the night, the chicheria (bar) that shares my block was having a big party. I woke up at 7 AM and the music was still going strong. I’m not sure if I’ve ever described Quollo (highland) music to you, but imagine if you can, a choir of children breathing helium and singing in Japanese. Yea….

So there you go. I’m thinking that the little toilet paper explosion episode really wasn’t my fault.

On a bit more serious of a note, I wanted to update you on David and Andres, the fellows I wrote about last week. We’re still working through wether David will be allowed to stay at the home or not. Miguel is worried that by allowing him to stay, the boys will think that he’s condoning what David did, and the next thing you know we’ll have 20 little babies running around (or…crawling or whatever). I don’t agree with this. I feel that these boys will never understand God’s love and grace if they don’t experience these things from us. I believe that there needs to be consequences for what David has done (as if trying to support a mother and child and be a father at 18 isn’t enough), but he needs to know that he’s loved and forgiven. If we kick him out, it just reinforces all the things he already believes about himself. As well, if the boys have to watch David struggle through this, that’s going to teach them much more than if David just disappears. If he’s gone, six months from now the boys won’t even think about what happened.

So…I’m trying to be patient and gentle in my words….and we all know how good I am at that. I have to confess that I’ve had a few good rants going in my head as I’ve been driving. I’ve let go pretty good a couple of times on the horn to whatever random fellow most recently cut me off. So please…pray for this situation. I need wisdom and patience through this. As do Miguel and Edly of course. I really feel that David is pretty open right now and willing to listen, which Miguel and Edly disagree with as well. So….we’re not completely on the same page. But…there’s no doubt about Miguel and Edly’s commitment to these guys and I need to keep coming back to that. It’s just that Miguel and Edly haven’t experienced grace a lot in their lives either, so it’s difficult for them. I think they feel that people are going to think they’re soft of sin if they don’t react strongly. It’s part of the church culture here.

Please continue praying for David as well. We’ve been talking a lot about what happened, and studying different scripture passages that relate. He’s coming over to my house this afternoon to talk some more, before he goes to school in the evening. I’m praying that through this God can begin the healing process in David’s heart. He’s got a long way to go, but he seems to be taking the right steps, so I guess we’ll see.

As well, please pray for Andres. Since coming back from visiting his family, he doesn’t seem to be himself really. As I said before, he’s got a lot of anger from what’s happened in his life, and now he seems to be putting up even more walls. He’s been uncommunicative and the other night he snuck out with a couple of guys. Miguel is worried that he’s hooking up with one of the local girls. This isn’t really Andres. I’m hoping to talk to him about it tonight. Please pray that he won’t decide to go down the road that so many of the guys here go down. Searching for love and acceptance in places that only end up destroying them.

There you go. Two updates in less than a week. Crazy I know. But there’s lots happening here. I’m excited about being home in a couple of weeks too. It’ll be good to see you all (at least those of you in S’toon). Thanks again for praying!

Hasta luego,

Ken

A BIT MORE: So I’m thinking some kind of score care would help me keep up with what’s going on. I met with David this afternoon, and it went well (the Nutello and bananas I had seemed to go over well too). He talked more openly than I’ve ever seen him. Then I went out to the home this evening and found out that Andres and another fellow, Diego had left. Both are good friends of mine, so that was a bit tough to hear. One of the other guys, Daniel, also left today. He’s the guy that I wrote about a couple of weeks ago…another good friend. Once again, I was reminded how fast things can change here….as you can imagine, that’s one of the more difficult aspects of this ministry. But I’m hoping that Andres at least, will show up again.

This has been hard on Miguel and Edly, so please keep praying for them. I know they’re feeling a bit worn out. By the way, I hung out with Carlos (my friend from way back) this morning. He’s back on the streets right now, but he’s surviving okay. We had the chance to talk about what’s going on in his life. He’s a kid that’s experienced (and is experiencing) a lot of spiritual oppression. I’ll write more about that some other day. But please continue to pray for him as well.

I should get this sent. Thanks again for praying.

Ken

(I’m in Canada in 2 days!)

Okay, new rule. When you don’t understand what the waitress is saying, don’t randomly order something anyhow. I thought I was getting beef. I guess it was an organ of some, if that counts. Maybe it was from a cow…

Well, this has been the week for tears. For those of you who know me well, you understand how well I do with tears. Actually, other people’s tears are fine. But when I get sucked into that whole emotional roller coaster….then we’ve got problems. =)

It started when I took some of the boys up to visit their families in another city here in Bolivia, Camiri. Andres and Jose Manuel (brothers), their two sisters (who live in another home) and the social worker from that home (along with the her son), and another fellow, Allan, all piled into my truck and off we went.

The weekend was great. I took the guys (along with Allan’s two brothers who live with his mom) 4-wheeling in the truck. None of them had ever done that before, so when we put it in four wheel drive and went motoring across the river, they were all duly impressed. =) Knocking the exhaust loose on the truck was really just an added bonus. That night when we went out for pizza, I had the chance to talk with Andres about his life and his relationship with God. That was the first time I’d ever heard Andres open up and talked about his past. His father left when he was nine, leaving his mom to raise him and his five other siblings. Then in 2004 his mom died unexpectedly at a young age. Andres wasn’t living at home anymore at that point so it was a couple of months before he knew about her death. It wasn’t until he went home to visit, that his grandmother told him. His grandmother tried to take care of all three girls, but it was two much for her and the two older girls ended up in a home. Soon after, Andres, and then Jose Manuel, showed up at Nacer (our home). Their older brother got married and started a family of his own. And, of course, the father never turned up again. His dad leaving and then his mom dying has left a huge hole in Andres. He struggles a lot with anger and trying to understand why this all happened. He really wants to have a good relationship with God, but I think trying to move past this has been difficult for him.

On Sunday afternoon I took the kids and their grandmother to visit the cemetery where their mom is buried. It’s different here than it is in Canada. People are buried in crypts rather than in the ground. As we walked, we passed some of the crypts of the richer families in town. They’re beautiful, almost like small churches. Eventually we arrive at the area where the poor people are buried. The crypts are stacked one on top of another and the area is dirty and unkept. Only a simple stencil of her name marked the grave. As soon as they saw the grave, all four kids started to cry. The youngest girl, who still lives with her, didn’t really understand what was going on. She was only a baby when her mom died so she doesn’t remember her. She just played and occasionally stopped to watch the other four.

Andres, who is 16, knelt in front of his mom’s grave, his head down and his shoulders shaking. Jose Manuel stood with his arms around the older of his sisters, while the younger one knelt down beside Andres. She’s only eight, so I’m not sure how much she remembers either, but the four of them cried for ten or fifteen minutes. Then I asked Andres if it was okay if we went and bought flowers for his mom. As we walked, I put my arm around his shoulder and told him it was okay. He put his arm around me so tight it was a bit hard to breath…and/or walk. =) He hung on like that was all that was keeping him standing. One great thing here is that flowers are cheap, so we were able to buy a big flower arrangement and then a smaller bundle of roses. We cleaned up the area around her grave and put the flowers in front of the crypt. It looked nice when we were done, and it gave Andres something tangible to do, which I think he needed.

Later that night as I drove back to Santa Cruz, I started thinking about the day. I realized that any time I’ve ever experienced a death or loss, I’ve always had this huge circle of extended family and friends around me for support and to go through the experience with me. Seeing Andres, this young guy of only 16, kneeling and crying alone in front of his mother’s grave, I realized that everyone deserves to have someone to put their arm around you and tell you that it’s going to be okay. It seems strange that it never really occurred to me that so many people don’t have that. First it made me thankful for what God’s given me, and then, in the midst of some of the struggles and frustrations that I sometimes have down here, it made me realize once again why God has called me here. My Spanish sucks and most of the time I’m not entirely sure what’s going on around me, but I can put my arm around a kid and tell him that it’s going to be okay.

It’s late, and I’m tired and probably a bit overly emotional =) as I write this, but I need to tell you one more story before I take off. Monday as I arrived at the home, Miguel took me aside and told me some news. One of the fellows, David (who I’ve written about before and asked you to pray for) had gotten his girlfriend pregnant. This was maybe not that surprising, but it was still sad. David is one of my favourite guys at the home. Even though he’s gifted and well liked, he has a huge struggle with self image and believing that he has any value or self- worth. He grew up without any family and for the first few years at the home, he cried himself to sleep at night he was so lonely. He doesn’t believe that anyone would ever care for him or love him unconditionally.

Which brings us to why he was dating this girl. Even though he knew the relationship was not healthy or what God wanted for him, he couldn’t bring himself to leave her. He didn’t believe that anyone else could love him. Obviously David bears responsibility for what happened as well, but his girlfriend goaded him into becoming sexually active by calling him names and mocking him for not wanting to. Trust me…I’m struggling with my attitude towards her through all of this. The social worker and I took her to the doctor yesterday to make sure everything was okay, and I was nice…but it took everything I’ve got. =)

At any rate, as I was praying about this, and trying to decide how to approach David, I really felt that God was telling me to give him a hug. Now again…for those of you who know me…I’m not really the hugging type. =) But…there wasn’t really anyone else and I kind of wondered if maybe that’s what he needed. Honestly, I wasn’t really sure how this was going to go. So I went into his dorm room and he was there by himself getting something out of his little cupboard. He shook my hand and gave me a funny look like he wasn’t sure if I knew or not. He hesitated for a minute then stood up. I hesitated for a minute as well (yea…we’re guys) and then I gave him a big hug. I could tell that he wasn’t sure what to do for a second, but then he just broke down started sobbing. You have to understand that these guys are street kids…and they don’t cry. So this was a big deal. He just kept saying, “Forgive me…forgive me.”

We talked for a bit and I assured him that we would be friends no matter what. I also wanted to make sure that he understood that God had forgiven him and loved him, and that nothing could change the fact that he was a son of God. After a while we walked over to the chapel of the camp next door and talked for a couple of hours. Once he calmed down a bit I turned to him and said, “Wow…a baby.” David just shook his head and said, “Yea.” I put my hand on his shoulder and said, “Hermano (Brother) haven’t you ever studied biology in school?” He said, “Yea, last year.” I was like, “Did you pass?” That got a bit of a smile, “No…”

Of course some of the prayer requests I have are a bit obvious. First, please pray for Andres and Jose Manuel. I didn’t say much about Jose Manuel, but he’s got some pretty significant issues in his life as well, as a result of what’s happened to him. I see Andres as one of the more gifted and solid guys here at the home. He has an incredible amount of potential if he can find healing and move past what’s happened in his past.

David is in a pretty vulnerable place right now, and he’s listening intently. (Now he decides to listen!) He wants to have a good relationship with God, but there’s a lot he doesn’t understand. Which is fine…that’s a part of life. I really believe that God can use this time to bring healing and peace to him. That’s not something he’s ever experienced before. The challenge will come when things calm down and life goes back to normal (as much as it can).

I know that David has a responsibility to this girl and the child, and I want him to be involved and be the father that this child needs. But at the same time, the culture here says that he should be marrying the mom (or at least living with her), and her family is putting pressure on him to do just that. He doesn’t want to, but…

Right now he wants to stay at the home. We had a moment when I wasn’t sure if he was going to be allowed to stay. I know that Miguel, in his heart, wanted to let David stay, but he was worried about what people were going to say, and if the other boys would view this as an okay to get their girlfriends pregnant. I was…passionate, shall we say, on the side that we needed to let David stay at the home (that was the moment I went past the twitchy nose thing and into full emotional blowout). I feel pretty strongly that as the Church, we haven’t always done this well. These guys don’t understand grace at all, and if we kicked David out…what does that say about our love and concern for him and the other guys. If they sin…they’re gone? As well, I think seeing what David is going through will teach the boys more than if he just disappeared and they never saw him again. At any rate, or the moment, David is staying.

Two other guys to pray for quickly, as well. Sergio and Jorge…both are dealing with some pretty difficult situations as well. It’s been encouraging to see them moving forward, but of course with that comes pain and anger…doubt and guilt, as things from the past get brought back up. These guys don’t know how to deal with those emotions very well, so it can be pretty difficult for them. I know their first impulse is to run, but so far none of them have. Please pray for protection and peace and wisdom for all of these guys, as well as for Miguel and Edly and myself.

Once again, the novel has come to an end. I know I need to write a little more often and cut down on the length of these epistles. =) But you know how it is. Life has gotten busier for sure. Right now I’m the only one with a functioning truck, so I’ve been filling in a lot with driving and hauling and such. I don’t mind, but it keeps things hopping!

Really quickly…some good news. I’m coming home to Saskatoon briefly in August. I had the opportunity to speak at a teen camp, and it pretty much paid for my ticket. So I talked to Miguel and Edly and they said I should go for it. So I’ll be arriving Aug. 9 and leaving Aug. 28. The last week I’ll be up at camp, but the rest of the time….I would love to see as many people as I can. Let me know if you want to get together, and we’ll work something out! I wasn’t that homesick or anything…but now I’m getting kind of excited! =)

Thanks for your prayers. I appreciate them and they make a HUGE difference here. Take care and I’ll see at least some of you soon.

Ken

I was behind a taxi driver the other day, who had a big sign in the back window which proclaimed “GOD IS MY DRIVER!” in big letters. After following this fellow for a couple of kilometres, I felt the urge to have a conversation with God. In His infinite wisdom and knowledge, somehow God hadn’t grasped the concept of lane changes and signal lights. Ah well… Most days the fact that I’m sharing the road with 1000 estupido idiotas (hey, you just learned your first Spanish!) doesn’t really bother me that much. But there are days. Today was such a day. I’m sorry, but someone turning right from the left lane (in front of four lanes of traffic) just annoys me. My horn only works sporadically, which is probably God’s way of saving me from having to seek forgiveness from random people. Then to make a great day even better, I was driving past the transit police with Edly, when one of the officers waved me over. He told me I had three outstanding parking tickets and had to go pay them or he would arrest me. This was a bit of a surprise for me. We had to park and go into the transit office where another fellow dug through a huge pile of old ticket booklets and sure enough, pulled out three tickets….from 2005….when I didn’t actually live in Bolivia. When I tried to explain this to
him, he just looked at me and said, “When you bought the truck, you bought the problems.” Okay then…

As a side note, I think I bribed my first police officer the other day. When the girls and I were up in Cochabamba, I accidentally got on the wrong street where only busses headed for the market are supposed to drive. A police officer waved me down and said that I couldn’t be on that street. I wasn’t sure what to do about it since the street was full of people and busses and vendors and animals… He told me to just back up. I was like, “Really? How?” Then he proceeded to make everyone pull over and get out of the way while this stupid gringo backed up for half a block to the intersection. It was one of my prouder moments…. Anyhow, then he told me that he was going to have to write me a ticket. I didn’t want to have to figure out where to pay it and such, so I innocently asked if I could just pay him. He hesitated a moment and then closed his ticket book and sombrely said, “Yes…yes you can.”

I want to take a moment to introduce you to a couple of the guys here, Yimi (Jimmy) and Daniel. Yimi is a great kid. I’ve actually given him permission to marry one of my sisters (I’m thinking Natasha). He’s the goalie for our futbol team and has one of the gentlest and kindest spirits I’ve seen down here. I hardly ever see him angry or really frustrated.

You can imagine my surprise when he showed up one morning, after spending the night with his family, with a broken hand. I asked Edly what happened, and she said that he had gotten so angry with his father that he had punched a wall. I had a hard time imagining that, knowing Yimi. But as it turns out, his family drinks…a lot. I always wondered why Yimi was living with us, since his parents live just up the road. But when his dad and mom start drinking, they start fighting. And from what I understand, they can really fight…and then they take it out on Yimi.

I took Yimi aside a bit later and talked to him about that night. The conversation started out being about what happened (Yimi said that he had already forgiven his dad, because his dad wasn’t really a bad guy), and eventually moved on to our relationships with God. I’m learning that I really can’t make assumptions about these guys. Somehow I had thought Yimi was a pretty strong Christian kid (based on his personality I guess), but as it turned out, he’d only been a Christian for about a year and really didn’t understand much about the decision he’d made. He thought that because there was still sin in his life, somehow his decision hadn’t been good enough. He was still trying to make a “complete” decision. It didn’t seem to me that grace really entered into the picture at all. So we decided to start meeting together regularly and work through some basic “this is what it means to be a Christians” stuff. I could hardly believe how much it meant to him to just sit and have a conversation like that. The fact that someone took the time to ask him what had happened was a huge thing for him.

The other fellow is Daniel. Daniel’s another kid who’s a bit quiet until you get to know him. He’s got a great sense of humour and loves to help out. He just up and washed my truck one day without anyone even asking him to….and trust me, it wasn’t exactly clean. =)

Last night I was dropping one of the guys off at the home before I went back into town for the night. Daniel was standing by himself by the gate, so I invited him to sit in the truck with me to visit for a bit. I asked him how he was doing, and he said not very good. So I asked him why. He just simply said that his family doesn’t want to know him. The boys had an opportunity to go and visit family for a couple of days, but Daniel’s family didn’t want him to bother coming.

Over and over I hear stories like these. Gifted, compassionate, talented guys…who’s families want nothing to do with them. Or worse, beat them into submission. You have to wonder what that does to a kid, and their ideas of who God is and what it is to be loved unconditionally. They really have no idea what that means.

Some days here are pretty tough…you just wonder if you’re ever going to make any headway. You can see God working, but for every one step forward someone makes, someone else takes 17 steps back. But of course there are good days too. God is bringing healing, but it’s definitely going to take some time to undo the years of abuse that most of these guys have experienced.

Before I go, some prayer requests. Please pray for Yimi and Daniel, and the other guys, that they would receive healing and understand the grace and love that God has for them.

We’ve been struggling with some discipline/obedience issues (guys sneaking out at night…drug use…stealing). Miguel finally dropped them boom on a group of guys and laid down the law (as a side note, one of their punishments was to “let down their hair”…shave their heads. This has been a great source of entertainment to me. The tables have turned shall we say…). The guys have responded well, but we really need God to work and change hearts in this. There is too much “surface Christianity” here…the guys act in ways that they know are acceptable, but their hearts aren’t really affected.

As well, tomorrow (Sunday) we are having elections for which political parties will be helping to rewrite our constitution here. It’s a pretty big deal. Our current President (while doing some good things) has a fairly strange anti-God/anti-church agenda (among other disturbing things). Please pray that the people here will have wisdom as they vote. Many of the highland people are uneducated and uniformed of what’s happening politically. The simply vote for the President because he’s “one of them”…a highlander.

And finally, personally I feel like I’ve been coming under some fairly strong spiritual attacks lately. It’s been a bit overwhelming at times. So if you could pray for protection and peace for me…that would be great.

Sorry I haven’t written in awhile, but with my sisters here and teams…it’s been a bit busy. We haven’t been able to call out of the home either lately (we uh….didn’t pay the phone bill), so I can’t get online with my computer. I have to drive out to the airport where I can use their free high speed wireless. I don’t mind (there’s a Subway here) but it’s a bit time consuming, so I don’t get a chance all that often. Hopefully sometime in the next few months I should be able to get a phone line at my house (it’s…complicated.). Thanks to all who have been keeping in contact and again, my apologies if I haven’t written back. I really appreciate the mail though. And I am trying to catch up! =)

Happy Canada Day to my Canadian friends. I bought cakes and fireworks for the boys for tonight…we’re going to have a good time. Sugar and explosions…two of my favourite things combined in one holiday. It doesn’t get much better….

Thanks again for praying!

Hasta luego,

Ken